Friday, March 23, 2012

Reason number 4,582 that I'm certain I'm messing up my child


Okay, so I don’t talk about my kid that much, and I promise, I’m not going to. That said, this morning I had a prime example of why I’m certain my daughter is going to need therapy when she’s older. Now, from a philosophical standpoint, I understand that all parents—no matter how awesome—mess up their kids. My mother rather famously said “Oh, honey, you’re gonna mess up your kids. Parenting is just damage control.” Thank you Mom.

Right, so my daughter is a huge fan of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic (I think this is some form of punishment, because I really liked My Little Pony when I was young too, but even I have to admit: Friendship is magic is really pretty darn good). Anyhow, her favorite pony is Pinkie Pie.

No wait, I’ve said that wrong.

PINKIE PIE!!!!!!!!!

Yes, that’s her favorite pony.

Well, this morning she came to me with mournful face and handed me her PINKIE PIE!!! doll and said “PINKIE PIE has a boo-boo.”

Humoring my three year old, I took PINKIE PIE!!! and asked “Do you have a boo-boo? Here, let me make it better.” I dramatically kissed PINKIE PIE!!! but then I saw my daughter was briefly distracted, so I decided to embellish. In PINKIE PIE!!!’s voice I said “Oh, thank you. That feels much better.”

My daughter’s head snapped around and glued onto the PINKIE PIE!!! doll. When I handed back the doll, she took it, eyes still ablaze in wonder that PINKIE PIE!!! had talked to Mommy. PINKIE PIE was put in a place of reverence on my daughter’s pillow so she could sleep while my daughter is at preschool today.

Yeah, I can already hear that counseling session: “And my mother made me believe that my dolls were real…”

Oh, and don’t forget to check out Tara’s blog today where she interviewed me!

19 comments:

  1. Don't worry. She'll be fine! The teacher at my son's school knocked stuff over and made it look like a real leprechaun tried to steal everyone's gold out of the traps they had to make. ;)

    Now to check out your interview.

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    1. That's funny. I'll have to remember that one for when my girl is a little older.

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  2. It's ok. My kids still leave notes for the fairies, pull the weeds in are yard (which they think are called Faerichoke and will keep the fairies away), are eagerly awaiting their 11th birthday so they can get their letters from Hogwarts, and believe that any teeth lost after 8 p.m. have to wait until the next day because the Tooth Fairy won't get our text message in time.

    Or...perhaps instead of reassuring YOU, I just revealed the extent of therapy that my children will need...

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    1. I'm terrified of tooth faerie time! What if I accidentally wake her up when I'm slipping tooth faerie treats under the pillow?

      and I love the idea that you have trained your kids to weed the yard. I'll have to employ that method...

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  3. I don't think she'll be in therapy too long for that one.
    Liked your interview at Tara's site this morning!

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  4. fantasy makes reality believable.
    like without sadness we wouldnt know what happiness is =)

    but i have to gag at the little ponies, never was a girlie girl. guess thats why i have 3 boys!

    thanks again for coming over today!

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    1. I understand your feelings on the MLP. I have to admit that for me, the real reason I think it's funny is because there's at least some nod to adults and decent story telling, unlike some other kid's programming.

      Thanks for having me over.

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  5. Age six, I won my first MLP at a horse show. Age nine I had all my MLPs taken from me (except that one I won cause I'd hidden it) and given away. Apparently I was too old for MLPs. >_>
    To this day, my daughter is pony obsessed and has a bigger collection than I ever had (they take up around three/four book shelves), including my rescued one. Most of them are found at op shops, so they're the older versions, but she loves them no differently than the smaller, newer versions.
    Actually, she loves anything that's pony or giraffe shaped.

    She hasn't seen the new shows but has some of the old ones on DVD. Which have some really good points in them as well.

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    1. OMG, there's a place where you can win MLPs at Horse Shows! Holy crapoly, I would have tried so much harder if I'd known there could be a pone at the end...

      The new MLPs are pretty funny and very kid friendly.

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  6. My kids still haven't quite forgiven me for teaching them that the ice-cream van was actually the dustman.

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    1. Oh man, that's awesome. I grew up in the sticks, so I didn't even know that such a magical thing as a truck carrying icecream was a real thing. It just seemed crazy to me (not to mention inefficient).

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  7. I wish I could do the voices of my son's favorite characters and get him to look like that. He just gives me his toddler "whatever" look and says "Mama silly."

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    1. One of the ways I entertain myself is by mimicking people. I'm not that good at it, but when you've heard the same pony over and over again (there are only six episodes on dvd!), well, let's just say I've had some practice.

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  8. Pinkie Pie was a favorite in our house too! And I love your mom's line - so true!
    When my 14-year-old was 6, she wanted to know where babies came from...so I sort of embellished on the stork story. I forgot about it over the years, but apparently she didn't. I'll never forget her face when she came home from her 5th grade health class and said, "You lied to me."
    Ahh the therapy stories...

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    1. I told my daughter “they had to cut mummy open to get her out cause, even then, she used to fluff about.” Funnily enough, she was cool with it and knows it's not the norm.

      Living on a farm makes this sort of thing easy. By the time she reached five, she (and most of her preschool classmates) had a fair idea of where they come from (honestly, the classroom had a picture displaying a baby still in its mother).
      By now (via her pet sheep who is now a wether) she’s grasped the idea of castration – known to her as removal of “boy bits” – that it’ll mean said sheep can’t become a daddy. The how a mummy gets pregnant still boggles her, though she knows it takes both mum and dad.
      I think six might be just a tad young for “that talk”. Although, if she’s anything like me, she’ll have figured out the logistics by the time she’s seven.
      Hopefully, she won't need therapy for it.

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    2. Oh man, the stork story... I'd better start thinking about how I'm going to explain that one now. I only have a few years to come up with something good.

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  9. LOL. I love that you actually kept her name as PINKIE PIE!!! throughout the entire post. hahaha.

    I never had an attachment to a doll of any kind, but my cousin carried a Simba stuffed animal EVERYWHERE!! I knew who she was from afar because she would carry it. lol.

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    1. Yeah, my family had a couple of the sacred dolls too. Thanks for stopping by.

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